Happy Monday and happy December!
This past week has been filled with so much excitement for me that I can hardly keep track of it all! Last Friday, I kicked off my first holiday season since my promotion to store manager and I couldn't be more excited! I continue to absolutely adore my job and my coworkers each and every day. In fact, if I could go to work every day and only have communication with my the associates and managers at my store and throughout the company, every day would be like a vacation.
However, that is simply not possible.
The problematic part of the equation is really the fact that at some point, the doors open up and customers begin shopping. I use the term "shopping" very loosely. Most people that come into the store, make a big mess, and leave without making a single purchase. Less than half of the people that come "shopping" will respond to you let alone even look your way when you say hello to them. If I had a dollar for every time I asked, "Hi, how are you today?" and a customer responded with "No, I'm just looking." I would be able to retire. During the non-holiday time of year, I'd say that somewhere between 5-6% of people genuinely suck. When they enter the store, there is nothing that you can say or do that can fix it.
During the holiday season; however, that 5-6% turns into roughly 30% of permanently dissatisfied customers. You don't even have to work in retail to witness these idiots though. If you have ever waited in line at the mall, chances are you have seen someone throw an adult temper tantrum. You know, there's always one person in line that thinks that their time on earth is infinitely more important that anyone else's time. The person that huffs and puffs because, well gosh, it's CHRISTMAS TIME AND THEY HAVE TO WAIT IN A LINE because they aren't the only person that woke up on a Saturday in December and decided to go to the mall to go Christmas shopping. Please, spare me.
In the last week, I have been screamed at four times. When I say screamed at, I mean it. Four separate people gave me the business on four different occasions. I was verbally assaulted and told about myself on four out of five days that I worked last week. Luckily for me, I am resilient.
I'd like to take some time to talk about these individuals that gave me the business but before I do, please let me kindly remind you where I work. I work at a shopping mall. Nothing that I do, in any way, has any serious impact on someone's life or well being. I'm not providing chemotherapy to cancer patients. I'm not performing brain surgery on severe head trauma victims. I'm not an air traffic controller. I don't work in payroll. Nothing that I do at my place of work should have any substantial impact on someone's life. Nothing that I do should cause an adult temper tantrum. And, do you know why? Because, I sell tee shirts.
First adult temper tantrum of the week: The middle-aged mom that decided to create her own line on black Friday at approximately 12:20am. I approached the woman, and the small group of people that had followed her lead and politely pointed out that the line to the register had formed in the opposite direction. Every person casually walked to the other side of the store. Everyone except for the woman that started the problem. She yelled at me, basically because she was an idiot and couldn't use context clues, and when I said "okay" that made it even worse. "Yeah, it's okay to you because YOU haven't been waiting in line." I walked away, end of story. Reminder, my store opened at midnight. She yelled at me at 12:20. If she entered the store as soon as we opened, grabbed an item, and got into line, she had been "waiting in line" for 20 minutes AT THE MOST. I worked from 10:30p.m on Thanksgiving until 2p.m. on Friday. Yet, this bitch had the nerve to insinuate that I didn't understand her time contraints. I legitimately hope that her vehicle ran out of gas on the way home.
Second adult temper tantrum: An average mom that thought that she was a lot hotter than she actually was AND thought that she understood how my point of sale system worked. This bitch told me that she wanted to talk to me while I was still wearing my coat and purse. I just walked into my store and she was pulling me away from the register and into a different room. She wanted to lecture me in private, so that was nice. Her ranted started with "I work at Coach..." and from that point on I made the decision to go ahead and block out whatever came out of her stupid mouth for the next five minutes or so. The last thing she said was, "You probably think I'm a bitch." I said that I didn't but, well, I lied. In the end, she told me that she just wanted to let me know how she didn't like the fact that she could only use her coupon once. In the words of Jesse, "Oh, so she wanted a forever coupon?" But yes, that is exactly what she wanted. I hope that someone poops on the floor at the Coach store.
The other two women that told me about myself this week were in regards to a return with an un-scannable receipt and an out of stock glitter sweater. If the worst thing that happened to either of these women was that they could only get cash back instead of having the money refunded to her American Express or that my store was sold out of a glitter sweater, then they have fantastic lives. But, not if you ask them. The performance that the woman with the American Express card deserved an academy award.
I'll leave you with a few final thoughts.
There are people dying, right now, as I type this. There are people starving. There are people that are homeless. There are people that are alone. There are people that are illiterate. There are people that don't know their families. There are people that won't get to celebrate Christmas.
Instead of being angry because a store doesn't have the sweater that you want, be grateful that you have the ability to leave your warm house and drive to a shopping mall to spend $50 on a sweater that you probably don't need anyway. Be grateful that you live in America. Be thankful that you have food to eat, that you have a family to love you, and that you have good health. Just be grateful to be alive.
Once you we can wrap our heads around the idea that there are 7 BILLION people in the world and that your "problem" of a sold out sweater or a long line or an expired coupon isn't a problem at all in the grand scheme of life, perhaps we could spend more time being thankful for all that we have.
And finally, if you see someone throwing one of these adult temper tantrums in public, please tell them to fuck themselves. First off, because they should. And secondly, because whoever they are unloading all of their troubles on cannot tell them to do so without losing their job.
Here's to tackling bad attitudes and spreading holiday cheer,
Xoxo
