As promised and back by popular demand, here we go....
Let me set the scene for you. I took a few days off from work and I am visiting with my family and friends in Pittsburgh and I could not possibly be any happier. On Thursday, my dad and I went to the Pirate game in the afternoon and the parking situation was less than ideal. After driving around aimlessly for what my dad refers to as "two days," we decided to bite the bullet and park about a mile away and walk to the game. Dad said he will "probably need to have his foot amputated" due to the walk.
I am pointing out his comments so that you readers have a strong understanding for where my thick sarcasm comes from.
I am pointing out his comments so that you readers have a strong understanding for where my thick sarcasm comes from.
Regardless, we are making the trek over to the game and there are two guys walking behind us. The men are probably college aged and I hear one of them say to the other, "Being in a relationship just isn't worth it, man. It's a lot of work and I see how miserable my roommate is with his girlfriend everyday. I don't understand why anyone would want to be in a relationship in the first place." To which his friend replies the standard response of an inaudible grumble.
Now, if you know me, you understand how hard it was for me to just let these two guys scoot past my dad and I without making some sassy comment or sticking out my foot for this dummy to trip on. Maybe I am a man eater, maybe I am an extreme advocate for girl power, or maybe I have an internal fear that my boyfriend's friends are probably saying the same things about me when they translate my actions into those of a psychotic woman. Regardless, this comment really got me thinking over the last couple of days as to why this friend could have possibly assumed or come to the conclusion that his roommate is "miserable" with his girlfriend.
Here is what I've come up with:
1. His friend/roommate has said to him before "gosh, I am just miserable with Amy."
2. His friend/roommate has told him tales about how terrible Amy is.
3. His friend/roommate rolls his eyes or seems grumpy in Amy's presence.
4. He likes hooking up with multiple girls so much so that he doesn't understand monogamy.
5. He doesn't like putting forth effort on any obstacle deemed as "hard."
6. No girl wants to date this guy, so he's playing it off like he doesn't want a girlfriend.
So, allow me to take you on a magical journey and break these down one by one....
1. His friend/roommate has said to him before, "Gosh, I am just miserable with Amy."
Let's get real with this one- it likely did not happen. Most men out there aren't very open with expressing their feelings, especially with their bros. I think it is incredibly unlikely that while these two were splitting up their share of the monthly bills, one of the guys said, "hey man, can I talk to you about my relationship?" Now, there is always a possibility that I could be wrong. But in this case, I sincerely doubt that this happened.
IF you are a man and you are A) telling your friends how much you can't stand your significant other or B) reading this post thinking "but Nicole, I really AM miserable with my girlfriend." Well, gentlemen, do yourself a favor and break up with this girl and get on with your life. Most men are pretty good at breaking up with girls OR they are even better at treating women like a big bag of garbage until the girl throws in the towel so that he doesn't have to do the dirty work. Either way, life is too short to spend it in some unhappy relationship.
2. His friend/roommate has told him tales about how terrible Amy is.
Now, this... this is a possibility.
We've all heard these stories before. Hell, I have been this story before. "Nicole has OCD, if I leave my socks on the ground she freaks out." And, lets get real, if they're saying it in front of us... they're probably saying worse when we aren't around. Trust me. So, it is a likely possibility that this guy's roommate could have said something like this. Amy is complaining about the socks (or anything ever) and now guess what? Amy is a grade A bitch and the roommate is "miserable."
Now gentlemen, allow me to challenge you to consider the source and the facts. Do I get angry when Ryan's socks are on the floor? Yes, yes I do. Because they are smelly and the hamper is LITERALLY ten feet from where Ryan (love you, babe) tosses them. Is my complaining about said socks annoying? Yeah, maybe it is. But, do you know what's annoying to me? Doing laundry at midnight on a Sunday because you've realized all of your underwear/undershirts/socks are dirty BECAUSE THEY WEREN'T IN THE HAMPER. Two sides to every story, people. Ultimately, having a girlfriend that wants to clean your socks isn't exactly grounds for hating life... ask around.
3. His friend/roommate rolls his eyes or seems grumpy in Amy's presence.
This is an even better possibility and I'm going to tell you why. Have you, ladies, ever been with a group of guys (your man included) and your significant other tells you that he loves you? No? Hmm, ever wonder why? Because guys make fun of their friends for doing emotional things in public. "Awwww look at you two holding hands." Or, "Can you come outside with us or do you have to ask Nicole first?" That's why. Men in numbers create an environment that when you can't stand your girlfriend, thats the norm. They breed the idea that unhappiness is cool and well, it's not. So when your man makes fun of you or repeats something that you say- he's trying to look cool in front of his friends. And, however it is that his friends interpret that is up to them honestly.
4. He likes hooking up with multiple girls so much so that he doesn't understand monogamy.
Depending on how old the guy is, this could be a possibility. This particular guy was college aged so he is probably in the down-to-party stage and potentially in a sex driven stage as well. "I don't understand why anyone would want to be in a relationship anyways," to me, indicates that this bro probably hasn't even been in one. It seems that he doesn't yet know what it's like to love someone out there more than pizza. Because, let's get real, I have been in some genuinely questionable relationships. I won't get stared with those because they wouldn't fit in this blog. But, I digress. Even after the off the wall relationships that I've gotten myself into a time or two, I haven't said, "I don't understand why anyone would want to be in a relationship anyways," because, I understand why.
5. He doesn't like putting forth any effort on any obstacle deemed as "hard."
"It's a lot of work," says the friend. When we are born, we don't walk out of the womb. We work very very hard in our younger year(s) to get our feet under us and walk towards our parents for our favorite toy. You know what was hard? The day I learned to ride a two wheeler and I rode my bike directly into a thorn bush in my neighborhood. In 2010, I graduated college and let me tell you that it wasn't a walk in the park. Between 2012 and 2013 I ran two half marathons the training was long and difficult and the races were too. In 2013, I moved to a city where I knew 0 people and that wasn't easy either. Relationships aren't easy. But if I had never struggled through anything in my life guess what? I would be sitting on my parents floor waiting from them to bring me a damn toy, I wouldn't have a career and I would be lonely as shit. So guys, FYI, life isn't always a game of Candyland.
6. No girl wants to date this guy, so he's playing it off like he doesn't want a girlfriend.
No explanation necessary on this one, pretty self explanatory.
But the real message here is.... Guys, don't pass judgement on your friend's relationships. It's not appropriate and unless you're involved in some creepy love triangle, that relationship involves two people and you simply aren't one of them. Don't make fun of him for loving his girlfriend, thats immature. And don't go around talking about his girlfriend like she's the spawn of satan when she's just trying to do some damn laundry. And guys, tell your woman how you really feel regardless of how it will be perceived!
Here's to LOVE <3
Xoxo
1. His friend/roommate has said to him before, "Gosh, I am just miserable with Amy."
Let's get real with this one- it likely did not happen. Most men out there aren't very open with expressing their feelings, especially with their bros. I think it is incredibly unlikely that while these two were splitting up their share of the monthly bills, one of the guys said, "hey man, can I talk to you about my relationship?" Now, there is always a possibility that I could be wrong. But in this case, I sincerely doubt that this happened.
IF you are a man and you are A) telling your friends how much you can't stand your significant other or B) reading this post thinking "but Nicole, I really AM miserable with my girlfriend." Well, gentlemen, do yourself a favor and break up with this girl and get on with your life. Most men are pretty good at breaking up with girls OR they are even better at treating women like a big bag of garbage until the girl throws in the towel so that he doesn't have to do the dirty work. Either way, life is too short to spend it in some unhappy relationship.
2. His friend/roommate has told him tales about how terrible Amy is.
Now, this... this is a possibility.
We've all heard these stories before. Hell, I have been this story before. "Nicole has OCD, if I leave my socks on the ground she freaks out." And, lets get real, if they're saying it in front of us... they're probably saying worse when we aren't around. Trust me. So, it is a likely possibility that this guy's roommate could have said something like this. Amy is complaining about the socks (or anything ever) and now guess what? Amy is a grade A bitch and the roommate is "miserable."
Now gentlemen, allow me to challenge you to consider the source and the facts. Do I get angry when Ryan's socks are on the floor? Yes, yes I do. Because they are smelly and the hamper is LITERALLY ten feet from where Ryan (love you, babe) tosses them. Is my complaining about said socks annoying? Yeah, maybe it is. But, do you know what's annoying to me? Doing laundry at midnight on a Sunday because you've realized all of your underwear/undershirts/socks are dirty BECAUSE THEY WEREN'T IN THE HAMPER. Two sides to every story, people. Ultimately, having a girlfriend that wants to clean your socks isn't exactly grounds for hating life... ask around.
3. His friend/roommate rolls his eyes or seems grumpy in Amy's presence.
This is an even better possibility and I'm going to tell you why. Have you, ladies, ever been with a group of guys (your man included) and your significant other tells you that he loves you? No? Hmm, ever wonder why? Because guys make fun of their friends for doing emotional things in public. "Awwww look at you two holding hands." Or, "Can you come outside with us or do you have to ask Nicole first?" That's why. Men in numbers create an environment that when you can't stand your girlfriend, thats the norm. They breed the idea that unhappiness is cool and well, it's not. So when your man makes fun of you or repeats something that you say- he's trying to look cool in front of his friends. And, however it is that his friends interpret that is up to them honestly.
4. He likes hooking up with multiple girls so much so that he doesn't understand monogamy.
Depending on how old the guy is, this could be a possibility. This particular guy was college aged so he is probably in the down-to-party stage and potentially in a sex driven stage as well. "I don't understand why anyone would want to be in a relationship anyways," to me, indicates that this bro probably hasn't even been in one. It seems that he doesn't yet know what it's like to love someone out there more than pizza. Because, let's get real, I have been in some genuinely questionable relationships. I won't get stared with those because they wouldn't fit in this blog. But, I digress. Even after the off the wall relationships that I've gotten myself into a time or two, I haven't said, "I don't understand why anyone would want to be in a relationship anyways," because, I understand why.
5. He doesn't like putting forth any effort on any obstacle deemed as "hard."
"It's a lot of work," says the friend. When we are born, we don't walk out of the womb. We work very very hard in our younger year(s) to get our feet under us and walk towards our parents for our favorite toy. You know what was hard? The day I learned to ride a two wheeler and I rode my bike directly into a thorn bush in my neighborhood. In 2010, I graduated college and let me tell you that it wasn't a walk in the park. Between 2012 and 2013 I ran two half marathons the training was long and difficult and the races were too. In 2013, I moved to a city where I knew 0 people and that wasn't easy either. Relationships aren't easy. But if I had never struggled through anything in my life guess what? I would be sitting on my parents floor waiting from them to bring me a damn toy, I wouldn't have a career and I would be lonely as shit. So guys, FYI, life isn't always a game of Candyland.
6. No girl wants to date this guy, so he's playing it off like he doesn't want a girlfriend.
No explanation necessary on this one, pretty self explanatory.
But the real message here is.... Guys, don't pass judgement on your friend's relationships. It's not appropriate and unless you're involved in some creepy love triangle, that relationship involves two people and you simply aren't one of them. Don't make fun of him for loving his girlfriend, thats immature. And don't go around talking about his girlfriend like she's the spawn of satan when she's just trying to do some damn laundry. And guys, tell your woman how you really feel regardless of how it will be perceived!
Here's to LOVE <3
Xoxo
